Sikhism·Opening Banis·So Dar, Shabad 4
Verse 3 of 5

No One Is the Support of Anyone Else

ਜਨਨਿ ਪਿਤਾ ਲੋਕ ਸੁਤ ਬਨਿਤਾ ਕੋਇ ਨ ਕਿਸ ਕੀ ਧਰਿਆ ॥
janan pitaa lok sut banitaa ko-ay na kis kee Dhari-aa.
Mothers, fathers, friends, children and spouses-no one is the support of anyone else.
ਸਿਰਿ ਸਿਰਿ ਰਿਜਕੁ ਸੰਬਾਹੇ ਠਾਕੁਰੁ ਕਾਹੇ ਮਨ ਭਉ ਕਰਿਆ ॥੨॥
sir sir rijak sambaahay thaakur kaahay man bha-o kari-aa. ||2||
For each and every person, our Lord and Master provides sustenance. Why are you so afraid, O mind? ||2||

Translation by Dr. Sant Singh Khalsa

In plain words

Mothers, fathers, friends, children, husbands and wives — none of them is ultimately the support of another. Each depends on something deeper.

For each and every living being, it is the Lord who provides sustenance. So why, O mind, are you so afraid?

Every person who loves you is a channel — the source that flows through them is what actually sustains you.
The deeper layer

This is not a cold teaching — it does not dismiss the love of parents, friends and family. It locates that love within a larger truth: the love that flows through a mother, a father, a friend, comes from the same source that sustains all life. They are channels, not origins.

When we make any person our ultimate support — the one we cannot live without, the one who holds us together — we are asking them to carry something only the source can carry. They will fail, not because they don't love us, but because no finite being can bear infinite weight. Recognising where support actually comes from frees both you and the people you love.

A Question to Sit With

Have you ever leaned on someone so heavily that it became too much for them? What does it feel like when you realise the weight we sometimes put on the people we love?

Translation by Dr. Sant Singh Khalsa·How we use AI

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