Sikhism·Raag Wadahans·Shabad 14
Verse 2 of 6

You Can't Perform Your Way Into Being Loved

ਹਉ ਸਭਿ ਵੇਸ ਕਰੀ ਪਿਰ ਕਾਰਣਿ ਜੇ ਹਰਿ ਪ੍ਰਭ ਸਾਚੇ ਭਾਵਾ ॥
ha-o sabh vays karee pir kaaran jay har parabh saachay bhaavaa.
I dress myself in all sorts of robes for my Husband, so that my True Lord God will be pleased.
ਸੋ ਪਿਰੁ ਪਿਆਰਾ ਮੈ ਨਦਰਿ ਨ ਦੇਖੈ ਹਉ ਕਿਉ ਕਰਿ ਧੀਰਜੁ ਪਾਵਾ ॥
so pir pi-aaraa mai nadar na daykhai ha-o ki-o kar Dheeraj paavaa.
But my Beloved Husband Lord does not even cast a glance in my direction; how can I be consoled?
ਜਿਸੁ ਕਾਰਣਿ ਹਉ ਸੀਗਾਰੁ ਸੀਗਾਰੀ ਸੋ ਪਿਰੁ ਰਤਾ ਮੇਰਾ ਅਵਰਾ ॥
jis kaaran ha-o seegaar seegaaree so pir rataa mayraa avraa.
For His sake, I adorn myself with adornments, but my Husband is imbued with the love of another.
ਨਾਨਕ ਧਨੁ ਧੰਨੁ ਧੰਨੁ ਸੋਹਾਗਣਿ ਜਿਨਿ ਪਿਰੁ ਰਾਵਿਅੜਾ ਸਚੁ ਸਵਰਾ ॥੨॥
naanak Dhan Dhan Dhan sohagan jin pir raavi-arhaa sach savraa. ||2||
O Nanak, blessed, blessed, blessed is that soul-bride, who enjoys her True, Sublime Husband Lord. ||2||

Translation by Dr. Sant Singh Khalsa

In plain words

I dressed up in every way I could think of, hoping to be noticed and loved.

But dressing up isn't what wins a heart — and I slowly learned that.

Truly blessed is the heart that is close to the One through love, not decoration.

You can't dress or perform your way into being truly loved — real closeness comes another way.
The deeper layer

The verse returns to the raag's steady teaching that decoration doesn't win love: "I dress myself in all sorts of robes... but my Beloved does not even glance my way." The qMonk voice, per the wellbeing rules, drops the self-punishing edge and keeps the lesson: outer effort to be noticed doesn't create real closeness. "Blessed is the soul-bride who enjoys her Beloved" — through love, not adornment. For a child: you can't dress or perform your way into being truly loved; it comes another way.

A Question to Sit With

What actually makes someone feel truly close to you — is it how you look, or something else?

Translation by Dr. Sant Singh Khalsa·How we use AI

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