Sikhism·Raag Bhairao·Shabad 77
Verse 3 of 5

When Love Turns Into A Knot

ਬੰਧਨ ਮਾਤ ਪਿਤਾ ਸੁਤ ਬਨਿਤਾ ॥
banDhan maat pitaa sut banitaa.
Mother, father, children and spouse - all place the mortal in bondage.
ਬੰਧਨ ਕਰਮ ਧਰਮ ਹਉ ਕਰਤਾ ॥
banDhan karam Dharam ha-o kartaa.
Religious rituals and actions done in ego place the mortal in bondage.
ਬੰਧਨ ਕਾਟਨਹਾਰੁ ਮਨਿ ਵਸੈ ॥
banDhan kaatanhaar man vasai.
If the Lord, the Shatterer of bonds, abides in the mind,
ਤਉ ਸੁਖੁ ਪਾਵੈ ਨਿਜ ਘਰਿ ਬਸੈ ॥੨॥
ta-o sukh paavai nij ghar basai. ||2||
then peace is obtained, dwelling in the home of the self deep within. ||2||

Translation by Dr. Sant Singh Khalsa

In plain words

Mother, father, children, husband or wife: all of them can tie a person in knots.

Rituals and good deeds done with ego tie a person in knots too.

When the One who cuts every knot lives in your mind, you find peace, and you live in your own home, deep inside.

Even love can become a knot when we cling too tightly.
The deeper layer

The people you love and the good things you do can tie you in knots, until the One who cuts every knot lives in your mind.

Bandhan means a knot, a tie that holds you. Family is named first. Love is good; the knot is the clinging. Then karam dharam ha-o kartaa: rites and duties done with ego, with the feeling "I am the one doing this." The knot there is the "I", and it can grow inside any practice, anywhere. Bandhan kaatanhaar: the One who cuts the knots. When the One lives in the mind, you find nij ghar, your own home within.

A Question to Sit With

Can you love someone deeply and still hold them with an open hand?

Translation by Dr. Sant Singh Khalsa·How we use AI

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